It's been weeks since I shared a blog post. Things are tough in so many ways, and right now I'm making the most of my calmer moments by getting in some much needed rest. A few areas of my life are suffering as a result, but burning myself into the ground won't make me a better friend, sister or student in the long run. Right? Anyway, those of you who support me, even with a kind word here and there, are like stars to me. Can't even express how much I appreciate you.
Without further ado, let's talk about movement. What does that word mean to you?
For so long, movement for me meant shrinking myself. Shaping myself, conditioning myself, conforming to expectations. It was about will-power, force and dread. Driving my body at full speed when my mind and heart sought rest. Movement was self-destruction and obligation, and I know I'm not alone in this. I see now that I did not move for myself, but for the version of myself I felt I should be.
I think so many of us get wrapped up in societal expectations and pressures, so that we forget the real magic of moving our bodies. In all of this, our reasons get completely muddled and lost. I want to make one thing clear: I believe that pushing ourselves both physically and mentally is totally awesome. I have always admired the strength and determination of athletes, in the same way as I look up to writers, artists and philosophers. The key, though, is realising our own motivations and limits. This is why comparison is futile - we are all built differently and with unique potentials, which is really cool when you think about it.
I was born with a healthy body, but I have mistreated it for so many years. Rather than embracing its positive potential, I have pushed it so that it suffers, weakens and tires easily. Accepting this has been huge for me. My body is a gift, and I won't take it for granted.
So, that said, I've been changing my attitude towards exercise. Maybe you'll join me?
Now, I move because it feels good. I exercise not only my muscles, but my mind, my imagination and my creativity. I move because I have the space to do so, and because my body is capable of amazing things. Not because I hate it, but because I love it, and because I deserve that much respect. I move in the knowledge that I must care for every aspect of myself in order to reach my full potential.
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| Art work by Dallas Clayton |
How do you love to move? Are you a walker like me, who finds comfort in the peacefulness and scope of nature? Do you like the sense of belonging that comes with team sports, or the energy and buzz you find at the gym? Discover (or continue to pursue) what you love, and accept that only you will know when you've found this. Be honest with yourself, because you owe yourself that. You are brave and strong.
If it costs you your peace, it is too expensive.
Love,
S x
P.S. I un-froze my gym membership, and I terminated it altogether. At this time in my life, it isn't for me. I'm done with running for miles and getting nowhere.
